Hamster on Two Wheels

So I’m at the BMV this morning getting my motorcycle endorsement on my license, and when I leave there’s this poor hopeless fat girl with short hair sitting there with a 3/4 helmet (looks hip, if you don’t mind shattering your teeth, nose, and jaw in a crash). I get out the front door and the only thing in the lot with two wheels is a shiny new red Stella scooter with a temp vanity plate that says “DAMSEL”.

Cute little scoot, for a girl. But… “DAMSEL”… I’m sure she was a perfectly nice girl, within the limits imposed by her environment, but… oh, Jeez.